Wednesday, January 30, 2008


i think my pencilbox is too nice already...
haha..guess what..someone who is damn damn idiot and tak bertamadun(uncilivised) had steal my nice nice pencilbox!!!pls....pencilbox also wanna steal??have nothing better to steal already i think....DAMN IT!!!!my radioactive pencilbox!!!!!!my female sign keychain, watson's glamour keychain!!!!argh!!!!my correction tape,liquid paper,scissors,...all gone in just less than one hour time!!!when i realised my pencilbox was not there anymore, i felt so ridiculous..i don't know wanna laugh or angry..haha.pencilbox hilang...students of tak bertamadun!!!!!i mean some.not all.but most of them i would say...even if my pencilbox is so nice and i put it on the canteen table then u just let it be la...damn!!!

when i told my mum about this..her reaction was so big...she even gave me one funny suggestion.she asked me to lock my bag..hahaha..this is too much man..then she gave me rm30 to go buy one new pencilbox and other stationery...i simply chose one pencilbox because i planned to buy one nice one next time..can't believe it when i spent more than rm30 just to buy those pens, correction tape, highlighter, eraser, much..i can buy one shirt already man.

some of the girls wear eyeliner to sch...damn..what for??
bring all those is not a school bag at all..don't go sch la if u all don't want to study..waste parents money..berdosa betui!!!!!stupid sch!!!should have other sch last time...
to the stealer of my pencilbox...i will be cursing u kaw kaw~~~!!!!!

Friday, January 25, 2008

what if god was one of us?

sometimes i think god has no eyes..maybe he does not exist at all in this world..sorry to say this..but if god exist why everything has been so unfair?why are those poor people facing poverty and some of them even have to hunt for food and go through a tough life?why some rich people are so rich til they don't know how to spend their money?all of us are human.all of us have eyes,nose,ear...then why??sometimes i do believe in luck.when u don't have the luck..thats it..u have to fight and struggle for your life and grab every single chance.what if god was one of us?then he can make a difference after he see what is happening around the world now..haha.i don't know why suddenly i will think about this..i know i'm very swt..=_='

Thursday, January 17, 2008

=) has been so long since i updated my blog...
almost 2 weeks~~!!!
well well..schooling is so tiring!!
when i go for gym also not that tired..everyday after school i feel so sleepy.but i didn't sleep..
even if got, i sleep for around half an hour only..cj said this is the way and i admit this is true.
after i wake up i won't be so sleepy! =)
nothing much happen recently.i feel contented with my life right now.(just that hmm i didn't talk to her..)
time passes really fast..real fast..haha..i'm happy with it~~
and, i didn't cry or sad or miserable anymore.yay!!!i start to think positively!!haha.
but sometimes when i miss him too much i'll cry for a while.just for a while.^^
i'm quite hardworking these few weeks.hope i can keep it up!!
i really wanted to get a good result in my stpm.i wanna win him!! ;)

i sit with sin yee in class this god..sometimes she is really crazy..she said she'll talk to herself and sometimes she'll suddenly laugh.when she says that.haha.i can't imagine it..why sometimes people can talk to themselves?so weird.its like there is no one around you and u're weird or maybe this is normal..she sometimes really act like a children and she is so scared when i start to touch or molest her.haha.

recently my mum's health is not so good..after she had undergo that operation..she can't walk too much or take heavy things..sigh.this few days she won't be cooking.i got to eat outside food everyday.last time she used to do all the household chores..but now no more..she'll just sit or lie on the sofa and watch tv.she can't babysit my two naughty nieces anymore.she is actually sad because of this...i really hope she'll be ok before cny..

Thursday, January 3, 2008

indescribable feelings~~ mum is fine..her report showing that she don't have cancer!!what a good news!!
she hardly sleep last night because she worried for the whole night!!!
the smile on her face makes me happy!!!it has been so long since i see her smile like that! =)

tomorrow i'm back to school again..!
i really don't feel like going back to school but i still need to.i must enjoy my last year in school!!
i'm not excited about it..think about study..everyday wake up early and go to school then go god..everyday i'm gonna do the same thing over and over again..what kind of life is this??sigh.i promised my mum that i would study well this year and score in my exam!!i must prove it to her that i can do it!!

i don't know what am i feeling now...
i really don't know...
only god knows it~~

anyway i hope i'll enjoy my school day tomorrow.

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

where is chiew bee?

i begin to hate myself..
i'm turning into one depressed girl who think and worry too much..
i went out with him just now.i can't stop myself from saying nonsense stuff..
at that moment, i feel like asking him to stab me in my heart with a knife so that my heart would just stop beating and feel pain..
but he still talked to me in a nice manner.i'm sorry darling..i don't hope it would happen again..
my heart felt pain when i talk to him in that kind of irritating way and tone.i hate myself..
i really don't know what is wrong with me.i hardly talk to my family today.i just stay in the room and don't know myself doing what in the room.argh!!!!i can't stand it.again.i feel like crying..i'm turning into one crying baby..argh!!!!
can anyone please give me some courage and hope??
can anyone please help me??
tomorrow my mum gonna take report..i really hope she would be alright..i don't want her to undergo an operation again.the feeling sucks when i see her being pushed into the operation room with her worried and sad face..god..can u please bring all my sadness away and let me have a great and nice year from now onwards?